Being There
by Oh-no-she-di'ent
Summary: This story takes place before LukeLorelai got involved. When Luke has to go away, Lorelai learns how much he means to her. Maturity is needed for later chapter. And this bad boy is complete!
1. Chapter 1

**DISCLAIMER: characters belong to people all the way across the country, and they are the ones reaping benefits. I doubt they'll have any interest in my amateur storylines. Although they could use my advice on some issues. The 'handle with care' label for L/L fell off somewhere in season 6, and it's since been kicked in somebody's gutter.**

Hey all! Thought I'd take 2006 out with one final Luke/Lorelai storyline. You know how I do. I honestly don't try to be sappy but I'll be darned if I don't go there every single time. It even sickens me sometimes. But, that's neither here nor there, so anywho...the story starts in season 3, I think. It's very AU since several changes have been made. Lorelai is opening the Dragonfly with Sookie, but she is also still working at the Independence, which means many things didn't happen i.e. the Independence burning down. Just go with it. And, I know it's annoying and soooo much work and '_man, I have to click on a button **and** type?!? Words?!?'_ but pls take time and review. I love those of you who do-consistently and without hesitation. Thank you so much. You all have no idea how much that means to me. If I suck, let me know. I'm a big girl, and I can take criticism. I wouldn't have made it through school otherwise. So, just leave a little feedback if possible. Thanks. Okay, I'm done now. Read please.

**Being There Part I**

"That is _not _a word," Rory said.

"Why would you say something like that? I would never just outright deny your vocabulary of any substance." Lorelai stared at the side of her daughter's face as they walked side-by-side to _Luke's_ diner.

Rory looked at her. "And while I do _appreciate_ that, it's unnecessary since I usually try to stay within the realms of that pesky little thing...what's it called? Oh yeah, the English language. What do you want me to do, just walk around and let you sound crazy and ignorant?"

"Why not? The leader of our country does it every day."

"You might want to set your bar a little higher. Do you really want to look up to Bush?"

Lorelai ignored the question. "I don't care what anyone says; if there is a _non_chalant, then there is a chalant. She dropped her voice. "_'Are you being nonchalant? No, just a little bit of chalant going on over here. What about you? Don't even answer that, dude. Of course you are tooootally chalant.'" _She looked at Rory as if her little impromptu bit had just proven her point.

Rory smiled. "Not that that doesn't make complete sense, and not to just like _kill_ your 'logic'," she said using air quotes, "but 'chalant' is not a word. 'Chaloir' _is _a word, which is the derivative verb of nonchalant. It's french, and it means 'worried' or something like that."

Lorelai just stared at her for a while. "You make Mommy so proud," she finally said with a wide smile decorating her face. "How did I get so lucky?"

Rory looked down and shrugged. "It happens. Maybe you found a penny."

Lorelai smiled. "Look at you all modest and passive. Really Honey, it's a great honor. Spice up the chalant, will ya?"

Rory chuckled. "You're truly hopeless," she said as she led the way into the diner. Lorelai smiled and ran her hand down the back of her daughter's hair affectionately.

"Counter or table, Hon?"

"Uuuum, counter," Rory said with finality. They both walked over and claimed two of the stools. Lorelai sighed as she climbed onto the one beside Kirk.

"Hey Kirk. How's it going?" She asked giving him her full attention. He continued to stare straight ahead, giving no indication of having heard her at all. "Kirk?" She said. His attention remained elsewhere, and Lorelai wrinkled her brow and turned to Rory. She noticed the same bewildered expression on her face as she looked past her to Kirk. Lorelai turned back and just looked at him. "Earth to Kirk," she said a little louder as she slapped the counter. He jumped and started to look around himself as if looking for intruders to his thoughts. He finally turned and saw Lorelai.

"Hello, Lorelai," he said calmly and with poised civility. "When did you and Rory get here?"

She turned her head slightly and gave him a worried smile. "I'd say about a minute before you did."

A confused look crossed his face, his head moving like a controlled robot. "I got here two hours ago. You weren't here."

Lorelai laughed. "No, I'm talking about a minute before you came back from wherever you'd drifted off to."

"Did I drift off?" He asked worriedly. "Man, I was supposed to be cured. That's the last time I give my money to a guy claiming to rid anyone of any genetic dysfunction. I wonder if he's still under that tree." He considered this for a moment. "That's where his office was set up. Nice view."

Lorelai cast her eyes downward and slowly shifted them to one side as if she was following and and then waiting for Kirk's crazy words to exit the space. Once she was satisfied that enough time had passed, she asked, "Are you saying that you have narcolepsy?"

His eyes grew, as did his tone. "No, do you think I have narcolepsy? Aw man, this can't be good." He placed his fingers to his temples.

"No, Kirk, you just said that you were _cured _of drifting off. I was just asking. I'm not quite qualified to diagnose. Still not certified, yet." She held up her open palms to him.

"Oh." He calmed back down. "Well, I don't have narcolepsy. The guy under the tree just wanted to catch any future afflictions and diagnoses. For a small fee of $2000, he was able to pre-cure me. He was running a special. If I'd have come one week later, I would have had to pay $2050. Talk about being at the right place at the right time, huh?"

Lorelai brought her lips in and regarded him silently. The conversation had veered completely off course, and she had to think a minute before realizing where they'd originally started from. "So, you have something on your mind, Kirk?" She asked.

"I guess you can say that. It's just not the same here without Luke," he admitted.

Lorelai softened as she touched his wrist briefly. "I know what you mean. It is a little off with him gone." She tossed a glance back to Rory, and she smiled her agreement. Turning back to Kirk, she added, "But he'll be back in...like a day. He just had to leave town for a couple weeks."

"I know, I know. It's just that Luke completed my day." Lorelai fought back laughter. She knew that Kirk was being open and serious about his feelings as always, but it didn't make it any less amusing to hear. Kirk continued, having taken Lorelai's pursed lips as buried sentiment for his forthcoming statement. "I'd come in, order, have him make some inappropriate comment about who I am with little concern for how it may affect me in the long-run, and then my day would end sufficiently. Sometimes I'd get offended and sometimes I didn't, but..." He drifted off as he looked away. "...I didn't even get to tell him that I love our little routine."

Lorelai frowned at him. "Kirk, he's not _dying_. He's coming back, and you'll be able to tell him everything you want to tell him." Luke's potential expression to Kirk's admission popped into her head. "As a matter of fact, I would really suggest that you _do_ tell him. Loudly and repeatedly if necessary." Laughter from her own voice filled her head.

His eyes went wide. "You're right. He should know that." He rose slowly and Lorelai's eyes remained fixed on him. "I love Lucas Danes and I love our routine!" He said loudly.

Lorelai pulled him back down by his sleeve. She spoke calmly even though she was about to burst inside. "You have to wait until he's here first, okay?" Kirk sat back down and nodded quickly. "And when he's here, say it just like that." He nodded again. "_Just like that_," she repeated. "Volume and everything."

She turned back to Rory with a poorly concealed smile creeping onto her face. Rory shook her head. "I hope it's still funny when you're given your first class ticket to Hell."

"Oh, it'll be _really_ worth it," she said reassuringly.

-OOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO-

The beginning of the past couple of weeks had led Luke to a small town in Utah.

Lorelai had been in the diner when Luke had received a letter that seemed to contain no less than ten hand-written pages. She had been yammering on about something, and he'd been listening. He listened until every word had been spoken. He cleaned, and he barely made eye contact, but Lorelai knew that he was listening. He always listened. She figured that to be a huge reason why he would sometimes be able to share random knowledge about her. Knowledge that sometimes served to shock or suprise her. It was the reason why one day a long time ago she had stopped calling him Duke, the scruffy coffee guy and started to call him Luke, the friend who happened to be the server of the coffee.

He opened the letter and began to read it. His face dropped slightly, but he continued to read and Lorelai let him continue without interruption. Upon finishing, he folded the letter slowly, his eyes concentrating on the not so intricate creases of the paper. When he lifted his head, he was met with Lorelai's bright blue eyes. Eyes so bright and clear they looked to be a well-constructed substitute for clear days on a cloudy one. Though Luke had never thought he'd see the day when Lorelai's lips would need any assistance in getting words out, he was able to see the questions in her eyes. Questions of concern and hope that all was well in his world after having read the letter.

He lifted his shoulders and dropped them nervously. "My cousin died," he said. A boulder-sized knot got caught in his throat, and he wished at that moment that he had taken the mail up to his apartment and chosen to read it there. There, he would have had an opportunity to soak up the news without an audience. There, he would have been able to digest the letter's content, put on a facade of extra grumpiness that would hide any true emotional pain. There, he would not have had to look weak and vulnerable in front of Lorelai. He'd tried to make it seem like, while awful, the news wasn't something that would swallow him and affect him in uncharacteristic ways.

Lorelai's shoulders fell and her eyes filled with water, bringing about another level of color. She softly gave her condolences before reaching a hand out to him over the counter. He took it and gave it a brief squeeze before releasing it. He looked at her, her unwavering and genuine concern making it harder for him to act like there was no resulting hurt. He excused himself, leaving her with no clue that, aside from his discomfort with the locale of the discovery, he was truly pained to learn that his cousin had passed.

Through all of the positives that could be said about landline phones, they all were moot when a person wishing to use it didn't have the phone number of said phone. That was the dilemma that his great aunt and family had been faced with when wishing to inform him of his cousin Wade's pre-mature death. The car accident had occurred a week prior, and Wade was rushed into surgery where they lost him immediately. The funeral had taken place the day before Luke received the letter.

Despite not being able to attend the funeral, Luke still felt that it was appropriate for him to go visit that section of his mother's family. He hadn't seen them in ten years, but up until then, he and Wade and other members of his Utah family had kept in touch regularly. With Wade's death, he knew that it wouldn't be the same and he wanted to check on his great aunt, who Wade had been caring for. In the letter, which she'd written, she mentioned how she wanted to see him.

Luke considered closing the diner down for a couple of weeks until he returned, but he decided that it'd be okay to leave Caesar in charge. He closed the diner early one night and caught a late flight to Utah.

That was fifteen days ago, and Lorelai knew from the contact that Luke kept with Caesar that he would be coming back tomorrow at the latest. This knowledge made her happy because she was anxious to see him and see how he was. She knew that the past couple of weeks couldn't have been easy on him, and she hoped that he wasn't being overwhelmed with all that was going on. She also agreed with Kirk. Luke completed her day. Seeing him and talking to him and working everyday to see him crack a smile that she had admitted a long time ago looked pretty good on him all filled a small portion of her life. His return would not be unappreciated.

-OOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO-

It seemed as if the beginning of Spring was the most popular time to have weddings. While it offered the perfect weather to marry in, it was the time of year when Doose's would all but sell out of headache medicine. Every employee at the Independence Inn would have no other choice but to rack up due to the abundance of stress and overtime.

Lorelai had spent every waking hour at the Inn--compromising, _taking aspirin_, directing, _taking aspirin_, instructing, _taking aspirin_, smiling through insults from both staff and patron, _taking aspirin_. Everyday, she'd pop as many pills as she could without exceeding the maximum amount allowed without cause for concern.

The stressful season had begun days ago, but the overflow of business had kept her from stopping by the diner on the day of Luke's return. Sookie said that she had seen him, so Lorelai knew that he was back. When she finally got a chance to drop by _Luke's_, he'd been back for a day and a half.

"Hey, stranger," Lorelai said as soon as she was through the diner's door. A wide smile covered her face as she walked over to the counter.

"Hey, Lorelai," he said upon looking up. He sounded happy, but tired.

She smiled wider at seeing his lips turn up in greeting. "You finally came back." He nodded. "We missed you." She sat down and leaned on the counter.

"Well, I missed you too. The town, I mean." He put little effort in backtracking. He just simply added the latter statement.

"I should hope so. I'd like to consider myself missable. Wouldn't you?" She teased.

"Who wouldn't?" He asked with deadened sarcasm. He really did sound exhausted. Lorelai took in his appearance. He looked thinner, especially in his face, and his eyes looked so sad that a shot of pain stung at her own heart.

"Can I get you anything?" He asked warily. He looked at her and she almost felt her heart break into two at the sight of the pain in his eyes. They looked darker and older like in the few weeks he'd been gone, a thousand secrets had been buried in them.

She stared at him for a moment, wishing she could say or do one single thing and make him feel better. Even if she could find a way to soak up some of his pain, she would do that without a second's hesitation. "No, I just came to see you," she answered. He gave her a half smile of gratitude. "How was your flight?" Lorelai asked. She thought she'd start with something small.

"Long. Cramped. Bumpy. And apparently not everybody finds it necessary to use anti-perspirant deodorant in small spaces."

Lorelai's nose wrinkled in disgust, and this caused Luke to laugh briefly. He found himself staring at all of her facial features as she made the cute face that he couldn't help but find humor in. His eyes scanned her face quickly trying to find room in his head to store the beautiful imagery that he'd soon have no choice but to rely on. The space was already filled with sounds of her voice, expressions, and shades of her eyes illuminated all of it. The smile dropped from his face. Reality set back in quickly. A reality that soon would not include her. Would not include Stars Hollow. It wouldn't even include the eastern side of the country.

She saw his sudden sadness and it felt to her like she was failing him in some way. She tried to pep up. "Well, you're back now, and that's all that matters." He nodded despondently. She felt herself about to cry, and she knew the subject had to be switched. Crying would be the worst thing that could happen when he was already feeling down. "Well, the...the Dragonfly is coming along nicely," she said nodding.

"That's good. I'm glad, Lorelai."

"Yeah, they said the lobby and desk area should be laid out in two or three weeks." He drew in his lips. "Won't you...come out and take a look? It won't be finished, but it'll give you an idea of what it'll look like when it is."

He started to nod but didn't say anything. He swallowed and started to clench his jaw tightly. He looked back to her. "I, uh, probably won't be able to do that," he said softly.

"Why not? I promise you I'll make sure Michel is busy at the Independence," she added with a small smile.

He looked down to his feet without acknowledging her humor. He remained that way for several seconds before lifting his head and looking into her eyes again. "I won't be able to come because I won't be here." He paused. "I'm moving."

A fleeting confused look went across her face. "You mean you have to go back to Utah?" He nodded slowly. "Oh. Well, when are you coming back?"

He released a heavy sigh before shaking his head. "I'm not."

Her mouth dropped partially opened and she closed it to swallow. She closed her eyes tightly before refocusing on him. "You..you...you aren't coming back? At all?"

"No," he said low. He pursed his lips and tried to avoid her gaze. "I'm leaving as soon as I can close on this place." His hands trembled as he tried to find his back pockets.

Lorelai looked down as her chin remained horizontal with the countertop. She heard herself ask him, "Why are you moving?" It was said because she felt like that was the next logical place to go with the conversation. It didn't really matter to her why he was moving because the end result would still be the same. He would still be leaving Stars Hollow. Apparently for good.

He cleared his throat, looking at the one couple that sat at the far window. "I have to go take care of my great aunt. If I don't, she'll go in a home. She needs me."

This is the moment when Lorelai looked up from the counter. "She needs you?" She asked simply. In her head, there was a word in that question that was emphasized, but she chose to ignore it. The question, however, still came through. Questions that she knew to be selfish swam around in her head--questions about why the older lady couldn't just pack up and move to Stars Hollow...about why one of his other family members that actually lived in the same time zone couldn't step up to the plate...about how she'd heard that nursing homes aren't that bad and how they could sometimes be a godsend to senior citizens. Luckily, none of those questions were verbalized.

He nodded in response to her question. "Yeah, she...uh...she needs someone to be there for her. Help her get around. Cook. Make sure she takes her medication. I'm gonna go and help her out. She's family and--"

"Do you want to go?" She asked.

He gave her a look of exasperation. "It doesn't matter what I want to do. She needs me, and that's all I need to know."

"But do you want to go, Luke?" She asked again.

He threw his hands out to his sides. "I've lived here my whole life. I have a restaurant and...a...truck." He sighed. "I'm not thrilled about having to pick up and move all the way to Utah," he admitted.

"But you are?" She asked softly.

He looked at her sadly. "Yeah, I have to. Everybody else is either married...or irresponsible...or gay, and she's terrified of homosexuals." He waved his hand. "She's just really old and set in her ways which is why she refuses to move into anyone else's house."

"So, Luke to the rescue." It came out blandly, which was a direct reflection of her internal numbness to hearing that Luke would no longer be in Stars Hollow.

"You can say that. I don't have anything as big as_ marriage_ tying me down here."

The fact that she would miss his presence in her life seemed such a lame thing to say when being held in comparison with a sickly relative. The pain that washed over her was enough to make her try and say anything to get him to reconsider his decision, but she wouldn't allow anything to come out. She couldn't, for fear that it would only leave a tainted memory of her in his mind. She figured he'd still leave but would have with him remembrances of the _selfish and inconsiderate_ Lorelai Gilmore. She did not want that.

"Everyone's gonna miss you," she said with smile. A worried and almost scared look came over Luke's face and his gaze dropped to the counter. She looked down too and saw what had initiated his panicked reaction. She saw wet spots on the sleeve of her jacket, and she closed her eyes as she realized that the wet spots had come from her own eyes. "I'm sorry...I didn't mean to freak you out. I'm...sorry."

He just stood there with his eyes shifting around the diner. Seeing her cry was not something that he had ever wished to witness. Not only did crying people make him extremely uncomfortable, but Lorelai was not supposed to cry. She was the sunshine and the happiness and the joy, and seeing her sad would only add to his distress about the whole damn situation.

"Hey," he started, "don't...don't do that. I can't...do you want some coffee...or some pancakes? I know it's late, but I know you love pancakes, so I can make you some pancakes, and I'll add bacon...or...or the whole pig if that'll make you happy." She looked up and opened her eyes, smiling through her slight shade of embarassment.

"Thanks, but I think that I'm just gonna go." She reached an unsteady hand over to the napkin dispencer and grabbed a couple before dabbing at her face. "I'll, uh," She didn't look up as she wiped but she was hoping that he wasn't looking at her and her pathetic state. Had she looked up though, she would have noticed that he was looking down at his shoes. "I'll probably come in tomorrow morning and take you up on that."

"Sounds good," he said looking up at the same moment that she did.

"When do you leave?" She asked, her voice cracking.

Luke almost grew mad with himself when he heard her faltering tone. "In about a week, maybe two."

She nodded. "That soon. Okay, well...I'll see you, uh, tom...tomorrow then." She stood up and turned to leave. Once she'd turned, she stopped and turned back around to face him. She spoke softly with her gaze on the countertop. "This is a good thing you're doing." She looked up at him giving him a genuine smile as more tears welled up in her eyes. "You're a great guy for doing this, and you have a very lucky family, Luke." Just as one tear escaped her eye, she turned quickly and walked out of the diner.

-OOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO-

Luke spent the week in his own personal Hell. It seemed like every two seconds, he was receiving hugs, happy wishes, presents, and an annoyingly large amount of business. He was sad to be leaving, and as much as he hated to admit it, he would miss everything about the town. Everything. And everybody in it. That's the reason why he tried his hardest not to snap and kick everybody out for good.

He ended up closing on the diner quicker than he had thought. A mere six days after his return, he was ready to pack it up and head out. Day five had everyone in the entire town and everybody from neighboring towns (it seemed like) stopping by and getting one final meal at the diner. Miss Patty brought punch and it seemed like every other middle aged woman brought a dish. Even though it annoyed him to no end that they chose to bring food to a diner, he held his peace because people were still ordering off of the menu. Luke promised that he'd visit at least once a year because if he didn't he doubt he would have been able to get Kirk out of the diner after the 'party'.

The night before he was to leave, he stood at the door of the diner looking out into the town square. Never having been one to get emotional, he found it a little disconcerting when he felt himself choke up a little. He swallowed the lump in his throat and did a decent job at moving past it.

One thing came across his mind that he had been trying not to think about all week. He still had yet to see Lorelai. She had said that she would stop by the next morning, but she didn't. She didn't stop by that morning, that afternoon, that night, the next morning... It broke his heart to know that while people he didn't even know were wishing him the best in Utah, someone he'd known personally for years didn't show any interest in his permanent departure. Rory had came to see him several times, though. She had given him a hug and a beautiful flannel shirt that she swore would feel just like Egyptian cotton against his skin. He had smiled and thanked her, even though he had no idea what the difference would be. The fact that it'd come from Rory already put it at the top of the list. He didn't ask about her mom, and she said nothing on the subject either. So, his heart continued to shed pieces of itself. He thought that she was a good friend who cared. But the doubt continued to grow.

He turned from the door and walked languidly around looking at all of the bare walls. All of the tables had been pushed aside, and the chairs were all stacked to the side as well. He hadn't sold the diner, but instead chose to just wait a couple of months and then rent it out to someone who'd use it as a restaurant. He knew that he'd be gone a long time, but he couldn't find it in himself to do anymore than a one year lease at a time, so that's what he planned to do. They could either take it or move the hell along to another shop front, he figured.

He turned back around and started walking toward the door, still looking at the diner's emptiness. When he got to the door, he looked up and discovered Lorelai standing on the other side staring at him. Her sudden appearance jarred him a little but not enough to show a physical shock. He stood right at the door and just looked at her through the window. Part of him wanted to yell and scream at her carelessness in their friendship's end. Or what _could be_ their friendship's end since he knew that time and absence changed people's relationships a lot of the times. The other part of him wanted to let her in and end their journey on a good, positive note.

Since he cared about her so much, he knew that he didn't have the heart to choose the first alternative. He unlocked the door and backed up as he opened the door. She stepped inside as her gaze remained fixed on him. She gripped the other side of the door and shut it behind herself. His hand fell away.

They stood there with casualness as they each looked to the other. Lorelai played with her fingers.

"Hi," she said finally.

He raised his head in slight acknowledgement of her greeting. "How have you been?" He asked.

"Not my best week," she said softly. "You all packed?"

"I'm all packed and ready," he answered.

She nodded and licked her lips. She looked away from him and looked around the empty diner. "I guess it's official," she said. She moved around him and walked slowly throughout the length of the diner before walking back over to where he stood. "Very official," she added.

"Why didn't you come and see me?" Luke asked bluntly.

"Luke---"

"You said that you would come, and you didn't. You didn't even come to the little gathering that everybody had here. Why didn't you come with Rory?"

"Luke, I--"

"I mean you did know that I was leaving tomorrow. I'm pretty sure that if Rory knew, you knew, so did you---or do you not even care that I'm leaving? Man, I'm sitting here all sad about leaving _Kirk_, so you know I'm gonna miss you...and it's like you don't care." He wasn't yelling or mad. If anything, he sounded hurt.

"How could you say that I don't care? I can't believe you would even think something like that." Lorelai could feel herself about to lose it.

"Well, you haven't shown much to the contrary," he said with something that could have easily been mistaken as a pout.

"And how am I supposed to be acting, Luke?!" She nearly screamed this, and it was accompanied by tears that seemed to pour out of her eyes in pints. Her lips trembled as she tried to fight back her sobs. She drew in a heavy breath and it seemed to work to calm her emotions a bit. She brought her sleeves up to her face and held them there. When she brought them back down, her face was red, but otherwise clear of any wetness. She looked down to the floor and started to speak in a register that betrayed her previous volume. "I didn't know how to come here and eat and talk like everything was the same."

She looked up at him. "I mean, look at me," she said with slight laughter. "This is what you would have seen every time I---." She shook her head. "It would have been too hard, Luke. It _is_ too hard."

He stood helplessly looking at Lorelai as she broke down and then picked herself back up right in front of him. When she had finished speaking, she stared at him, noticing how his eyelids had dropped and his jaw was clenched so tightly that it displayed muscles she didn't even know jaws had. He breathed in and out heavily before closing his eyes.

"Damn it," he muttered as a tightness pulled somewhere between his neck and chest. He turned away from her and walked toward the door with his hands balling into tight fists at his side. He turned back to her. He looked upward as he struggled once again to swallow the unwelcome lump that kept rising. It took all of his strength but he did. His voice still sounded strained. "Lorelai, I don't want to leave, okay? If I could, I would--." He shook his head as he looked to her pitifully. He looked down. "Damn it!" He exclaimed louder.

She looked at his bowed head before reaching out and taking his still clenched arm. Stiff at first, he allowed her to lift his arm, but he kept his fist clenched. She took both her hands and tenderly rubbed his wrist before moving her soft fingertips over his fingers. It didn't take long for Luke to relax his hand in both of hers. She stared down at his hand. She grasped it between her hands tightly as she looked back up. His head still hung to the floor.

"Luke," Lorelai called softly. He said nothing. "Luke, look at me." She tugged on his arm with a gentle pull. He looked up with his jaw muscles finally relaxed. She gave him a reassuring smile that took everything in her to produce. "Anyone that has ever had you in their lives knows that you are a one of a kind person. You are always there for people you care about. You never falter in your character. You are so loved and there are so many people in this world, no matter where you are, that would do anything for you." She paused and made a brief decision to personalize her appreciation. "I am beyond hurt that I won't get to see you every day. I know you think my frequent visits are inspired by coffee, and while I won't deny that to be the partial truth, it has a lot to do with the man who serves it. I'm going to miss you so much. I hate that you won't be there with me to see my dream come alive in the form of the Dragonfly. I hate that you won't be around to criticize my food choices and my coffee drinking. I hate that you won't be here anymore to look after Rory because you do. You so do and I know you like to play it down, but every teenage girl needs that male guy to place suck-y boyfriends in headlocks. I hate that I won't get to see your face every day. I hate that I won't get to see your stubble and try to guess how long it's been since you've shaved, while always hoping that you'll go just one more day because you look so good with it." She was running out of breath but she kept talking. "I hate that I was silently hating an old lady who lives thousands of miles away because she gets you and I don't. I hate that I didn't really feel shame for doing it because, hell, she's taking you away from Stars Hollow. She's taking you away from me."

She paused. "But what I hate most of all is that you are _gonna_ go. No matter what the crazy lady with the puffy eyes just said to you, you're going to get on that plane and not lose sight of your...goddamn selflessness that led you to agree to do this in the first place." She smiled. "Stars Hollow loves you, Luke," she added softly.

"Lorelai--"

"No," she interrupted with a nervous laugh. "Please don't say anything." She sobered up. "I doubt this could get any harder, but I don't want to test that theory." She laughed again. "Have a good flight, okay." She released his hand and walked around him to the door. She turned suddenly. "Oh, I almost forgot. I got you something."

"You didn't have to," he said shyly.

"Don't worry. It didn't even cost eight bucks," she said lightly.

"Oh, well, you _really_ didn't have to," he joked. He tried to smile but he was sure that it didn't make its way across his lips.

When she smiled at his joke though, his smile broke through as always. She dug inside her purse and pulled out an envelope. "Here you go," she said handing it to him. He took it from her and lifted the flap.

"What are these for?" He asked her.

"Well, I know you aren't a phone guy, and that's fine. I'm just guessing that e-mail's out of the question, so I figured we could write each other." She pointed to the book of stamps. "Just a little inspiration." She looked up at him timidly, and he nodded placing the envelope in his back pocket.

She stood looking up into his eyes. The sadness was still there, and they glistened with distant tears that probably would never get a chance to fall.

"Bye Luke," Lorelai whispered. She leaned into him to place a kiss on his cheek, but he turned his head slowly, placing his mouth in front of hers. She hesitated for only a second, looking into his eyes, finding his gaze fixed on her lips. She slowly brought her lips to his as she walked her body closer to him. Luke's hands came up and gently grasped the sides of her face while hers went to his sides and grabbed fistfuls of his flannel shirt. Her hands burned from the pressure of her tight fists, but she only squeezed harder. His lips rested on hers, and her bottom lip trembled as she moved it to the outside of his bottom one.

She stood on her toes slightly as she opened her mouth to gently take his lip between her teeth. He released a tiny moan, but did not pressure her to release it. She did this on her own soon after. She fell back to her own height as he pressed his lips softly against hers once more. He pulled back before leaning back in with a soft warm kiss to her lips. He allowed his tongue to run along her lip giving her a spine-tingling sensation that ended with a tiny shiver. She opened her mouth, and Luke relished the feel of her breath. He could feel it, and he wished almost for his heart to have access to that part of Lorelai as well. If she could find a way to send a breath, just one breath into the vessel that sustains his body, he knew that that would be enough to mend his heart. At least until he made it on the plane.

His tongue came out and moved into her awaiting mouth, and she allowed her tongue to slide over his. She leaned into him and released her deathgrip on his shirt, choosing instead to bring both arms around his neck. His hands dropped to her waist, and that's when the kiss intensified. Lorelai moaned and moaned and moaned as Luke's tongue battled fiercely with her own. His teeth dropped down to her lip and he sucked it into his mouth before gently releasing it. He went back into the kiss with his lips as it wrapped softly around her tongue. He brought his tongue back to hers and slowed the kiss down as they each fell into a blissful feeling of tongue on tongue. The pace increased once again, their hands pulling fervently at the body of the other. His hat got knocked off in the midst of the desperate clutches, but they continued to savor. Luke brought his lips to her bottom lip, kissing it quickly before kissing his way down her chin. When he got to her neck, the urgency came to a screeching halt as he let his lips rest on her skin. They breathed in rapid, full breaths. Lorelai stilled at the same moment he did. Both realizing that no matter how tight they held one another, no matter how deep they kissed, Luke would still be getting on a plane with no definite plans to return. He pulled his lips back and she dropped her head, both of them staring into each other's eyes as they let heavy breaths in and out.

"I'm sorry," Luke said to her as he stared into her watery eyes. "I shouldn't have done that."

"It was me, too. Don't apologize." They realized that they each still had a firm hold on the other, and both reluctantly stepped back. Lorelai looked down and saw the sides of his shirt that she'd done a thorough job of wrinkling. She reached out a hand to straighten one side but thought better of it. There was no guarantee that she would let go this time.

Without looking at him, she bundled her jacket around her torso tighter before turning to leave. "Take Care of yourself," she said not giving him time to respond. When she turned toward the window, she was presented with Kirk's face pressed up against the glass, but she acted as if it was nothing out of the ordinary as she swung the door open and walked out briskly.

"You guys were just--" Kirk began.

"Not now, Kirk," Lorelai said jaggedly as she rushed past him.

There was no stopping the tears that fell from her eyes, and if it were not for the quaking sound of her own sobs, she knew that for the first time ever, she would have found out what it sounded like to hear your own heart weep.

...**TBC**...


	2. Chapter 2

**Being There Part II**

_Dear Lorelai,_

_Utah sucks._

_Sincerely,_

_Luke_

That was the first letter that Lorelai got from Luke, and it came about a week after he left. She had set on her couch and laughed for fifteen minutes straight as she found that he even represented monosyllabism in script.

She sat down and attempted to write a response since she now had his address. Instead, she sat staring down at both the city and the state. Numbers started to run through her mind in calculation of miles and distance. They grew higher and higher in her head until she finally just stood up and left her writing area. She figured that she'd just try again the next day.

The following day another letter came from Luke. Lorelai was on her way out of the door when she went to check the mail. Upon seeing a letter addressed to her with Luke's name in the far upper corner, she closed the mailbox and went back into the house. She took off her shoes and got comfortable on the couch as she tore the letter open.

_Dear Lorelai,_

_Sorry the last letter was so short, but of all the things that I was feeling, that is what everything boiled down to. That was yesterday, so I'm guessing you got that already. If not, let me take a second and sum it up for you:_ Utah sucks_. And it does. So much. The weather isn't that bad, and my family's proximity is a new and not too annoying asset. But for every positive thing that comes with this situation, there are about ten negatives. Bottom line, there is very little chance that Utah will stop sucking._

_My aunt's name is Mae. I'm not sure I told you that. Aunt Mae is really...old. She makes noises when she moves like she's feeling pain in every inch of her body. It kind of creeps me out, but I know I'm not supposed to say that. She doesn't talk a lot, and when she does, it's almost like she's speaking in riddles. If I ask her if she needs salt on her egg whites, she'll start talking about how life is about choices. Her bedtime is at eight every night, and she gets up at four on the dot. Rain, sleet, sunshine, or moonshine, she's up at four in the morning. You know what that means? It means I'm up at four on the dot._

_But it's okay. Everything is fine, and I know that the right thing is being done. _

_It still doesn't stop the sucking._

_I hope you're doing okay. Keep me updated on your dream._

_Sincerely,_

_Luke_

Lorelai read the letter twice more before folding it up and placing it next to the one from the day before. She took a deep breath and put her shoes back on before walking back out of her door. She was officially late, but she still found herself going to the mailbox and checking it again. Just in case the mailman had forgotten to deliver something and had turned around to do it when she was in the house.

Since she had gotten two letters in the course of two days, Lorelai was giddy as she waited for the mail to be delivered the next day.

"Waiting for the mail?" Rory asked as she grabbed her purse on her way to Lane's house.

"What makes you ask that?" Lorelai asked as she stood at the window biting her nails, her eyes looking searchingly across the yard.

"Just a guess," Rory said as she shook her head. "Hey, have you written him back yet?"

"Who?" She asked, not taking her eyes off the window.

"Rowling. Did you not read his dedication to you in his last publication? He's waiting on a thank you, Mom."

Lorelai released a couple forced chuckles. "No, I haven't written him back," she answered. "I don't really know what to say," she said distractedly. "But with his letters, I'll know that _he's_ at least doing o---oh, oh, mail's here!" she said dashing to the front door.

Lorelai muttered a goodbye to Rory as she walked briskly back up the stairs with another of Luke's letters in her hands. She sat on the couch and crossed her legs before taking a deep breath and opening the envelope.

_Dear Lorelai,_

_I had fun today. I was walking down the street and I saw this ice cream shop. I can't remember what it was called, but it should have been called "Thirty one ways to clog an Artery". I still found myself going in and ordering a small banana split. I didn't eat it, but it was still nice. The reason I went in was because it was a place that I could easily see you in. _

_As I sat there, I saw you laughing- you know that laugh when your eyes kind of disappear and you get this slight indentation beside your left eye? I saw your eyes sparkling every time you took a bite of whatever disgusting concoction you would have had in front of you. I saw you placing your hands on the table and kind of wrapping your fingers around the fingers on your other hand like you're nervous when you're really not. I always loved when you did that. I saw you stopping your incessant rambling long enough to let me say something, and then I saw you kind of leaning in like you are turning on every sense just to hear what I had to say. And then I saw you delighting in it, even if it was something really uninteresting and colorless._

_Then I saw you walking up to the counter and asking if you could have just three more cherries b/c well, one cherry just won't do. And you're pigeon-toed. Did you know that? You usually take these small, cute little steps, and then I saw you coming back over to our table and passing me some extra napkins because you noticed that I didn't have any and then you just start talking about something else, not taking time to acknowledge your own incredibly sweet gesture. _

_The lady that worked there probably thought I was some crazy, creepy guy that sits in empty restaurants with a big, doofy smile. She probably thought I was a pervert or something. Well, I won't be going back there..._

_Anyway, I just wanted to thank you for spending the day with me. It was the first time that the sucking stopped._

_Sincerely, _

_Luke_

Lorelai placed her hand over her face as she sunk down into the couch cushions. The letter slid from her hands to the floor as she picked up a throw pillow and pushed it hard against her face. Her tears soaked through the pillow. Over the years, the old couch had endured many a tear and provided support for many a pain. In an hour's time, the pillow would be dry and another pang from a Gilmore heart would have been added to its life.

-OOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO-

Spring slipped by and rolled nicely into the long summer months. Rory graduated from Chilton and she and Lorelai embarked on a beautiful and enlightening journey throughout Europe.

While the trip together was one that neither would ever forget and one that neither had wanted to end, they were equally excited about the next step in their lives. Rory was off to Yale, and Lorelai 's grand opening was only a few weeks away.

The month was August, and it was six months ago that Luke had left Stars Hollow. His letters were frequent at first. For the first month of his absence, he wrote a letter everyday. She knew of all the people he came in contact with, his daily routines, his feelings about the circumstances that he lived with. She had built her day's schedule around the mail's arrival. If she didn't have to be at work or at the Dragonfly until late, she'd make sure it was a time after mail delivery. If she had to be there in the mornings, her lunch breaks would be spent at the crap shack as she waited on her front steps for his letter.

After the first month, the letters became sporadic. The first day that Lorelai did not see one, she had a small moment of panic as she looked on the ground around her to see if anything had fallen. When she found nothing, she called out to Skip, the mail carrier as he walked down the driveway. She told him to double check, triple check his bag to see if anything had been left behind. Nothing had.

A letter came a week later, then two weeks later. The second half of April and the first half of May passed with no word from him. Lorelai had stopped scheduling her days around his letters because with the new infrequent patterns, it proved to be an empty hassle. Whenever she did come home to see a letter from him in her mailbox, no matter how long it'd been, it would brighten up what was left of her day.

Sometimes they made her cry and sometimes they made her laugh, and on rare occassions, they'd elicit a mixture of the two. He never mentioned anything about her lack of letters. He never mentioned how, though he'd written close to fifty letters, she'd written none.

However, if Lorelai had written and sent a letter everytime she had actually sat down to write one, Luke would have over a hundred letters from her. But that wasn't the case. Everytime she would attempt to respond to a quip he'd made, or something sweet he had said or just to inform him of her general feelings, she would find it impossible to do so. Therefore, she'd walk away and put it off until the next day. That day still had yet to come.

She sat at the kitchen table looking at the three letters that Luke had written her during her two month trip with Rory. She held a pen of her own and kept tapping it against the stack of paper that lay at an angle in front of her. As she thought of what to write down, the memory of his last night in Stars Hollow came back to her. She'd known that she had to see him before he left, and though she wanted to put it off forever, she knew that that night was her last chance at a goodbye.

Kissing Luke had definitely been an experience. She relived it every night that she closed her eyes. Though the actual kiss was one of monumental greatness, it was a memory that brought with it the pain of having to walk away from him.

She took a deep breath and made the decision to stop thinking. Just write. Thinking is what led to six months of not writing.

She started off by apologizing. She wrote about how hard it was to accept the fact that she _had _to write. She let him know about the Dragonfly and the town's residents and newest events. She wrote everything that came into her mind. She used both sides of every page that she used, and when all was said and done, twenty pages of paper made up her letter. She placed it in a large envelope and placed several stamps in the corner.

Lorelai grabbed a jacket and rushed out of the front door on her way to drop it off. She wanted to get the whole process finished before the thinking started back.

-OOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO-

Three weeks went by before Lorelai received a response from Luke.

_Dear Lorelai,_

_I have to start by saying that I am so glad to know that you are still alive. I was kind of starting to wonder. _

_You don't have to apologize for not writing. I understand. And your very thick letter more than made up for all the months you missed._

_Let me just take a second and tell you how proud I am of you. You did it. Your Inn is almost ready, and I really wish I could be there to see you open the doors for the very first time. If anyone deserves this, it's you._

_Your words meant a lot to me. Everything that you said could be said for me a hundred times over. But I'll stop right there because I don't want to make this any harder than it already is. You're a great person. You really are, and I've always known that. It's not like I'm seeing all of this just because of that stupid saying about fondness growing with absence. If anything, the absence is pissing me off._

_Aunt Mae asked about you. I know you're wondering how she even knows you, and I'm probably the blame for that since I'm always writing to you. She always asks what I'm doing and I've said "writing to Lorelai" so many times that she mentions your name like she knows you personally. It's kind of funny how she'll just shuffle past me as I'm sitting at the desk and say something random like, "You make sure you tell that Lorelai to take care of herself." _

_She's really starting to grow on me. We sat down the other day and she kicked my ass in Chess. I mean REALLY kicked my ass. Thought I'd just let you know that there's still hope for when we get to be senior citizens. I might even let you win a couple of times. _

_Anyway, I'm going to take Aunt Mae's advice and tell you ('that Lorelai') to take care of yourself. Again, a thousand and one congratulations to you. _

_Luke _

"Oh my god, Mom! This is the sweetest thing I have ever seen in my life," Rory said as she held the letter from Luke in one hand and two of the hundred carnations he had sent in the other.

"Yeah, it's just great," Lorelai said dismally as she fingered her flowers.

"Excuse me, but do you not think that this," Rory said gesturing toward the display, "is deserving of a _little_ enthusiasm?"

"It's deserving of a little more than that," Lorelai mumbled.

"What?"

"I said it's incredibly sweet," she said, covering her tracks.

"But?"

"But," she began, not wanting to disappoint, "It's just another reminder of this stupid new reality that I have to deal with." She flopped herself down on the chair in her soon-to-be-open Inn. "I miss him," she admitted sadly. "I miss him a lot, and every time he goes and does something like this…" she threw a hand in the direction of her flowers. "…it just…it really doesn't help."

"Aw, Mom, I'm sorry." Rory came over and sat next to Lorelai, leaning against her shoulder. "He said in his last letter that he may come back and visit for the holidays, right?"

"Yippy," she muttered. "What is that? A whole _couple days_?"

"At least it's something," Rory said softly.

"It's not enough," Lorelai responded, almost inaudibly.

Rory released a sigh, dropping her gaze down to the letter in her hand. A smile appeared on her face. "Did you see what he wrote about getting old with you?"

"He didn't mean _with_ me."

"He totally meant _with_ you," she replied holding the letter up and re-reading the line. "He said how he wanted to beat you at Chess. He couldn't do that from Utah. And then he said 'when _we_ get to be senior citizens'. Who knew Luke could be so sweet?"

Lorelai rolled her eyes. "Who knew my daughter could be so naive?"

Rory lifted her head and gave her a confused look.

"He's gone, Rory," she said unapologetically. "He's gone and there will be no growing old and Chess games. He's in Utah, and I'm in Connecticut, so please," her voice softened. "Please just let it go." She placed her hand gently on Rory's arm. "Please." She stood up and walked toward her office.

...**TBC...**


	3. Chapter 3

**Being There** **Part III (Mature audience)**

"Speech! Speech! Speech!"

Lorelai smiled widely as she stepped up in front of the room full of people. Everyone started to applaud loudly, and she pushed her hands downward in order to quiet them. Silence slowly fell over the room, and Lorelai clasped her hands together.

"Will the driver of the - -" The room erupted in laughter. "Okay, okay," she began, satisfied at her spontaneous comedy bit. "On a more serious note, it is an honor to have all of Stars Hollow out here at the newly refurbished Dragonfly Inn." Everyone clapped loudly. Lorelai continued once the noise died down again. "It's a little weird to see something that you've been dreaming of for two decades come alive and go from being a dream to a reality." She looked over at Sookie and Rory who stood off to the side of her. "Everyone has been extremely supportive in dealing with all of the renovations and, well, _me_." A bout of laughter filled the room. "I know I haven't been the most pleasant person to deal over the last few months…" Sookie and Rory looked at one another and smiled in agreement. "…but," Lorelai said loudly, having caught the look. She laughed. "…I just wanted to let all of you know that I am very happy with the company that I keep. I love all of you so much, and without you all, this would still just be a notion." She looked at Rory as she said this before allowing her eyes to roam around the room. Everyone, even Taylor, stood smiling up at her. "Your words of support, your undying belief and faith in both my and Sookie's ability to pull this off…Being there, even when you couldn't _be there_…" She took a deep breath, breaking out in a smile. "This town rocks," she said, causing an instant explosion of cheers. She walked over and hugged Sookie and Rory.

She tried to push Sookie to say something, but Sookie resisted and said loudly, "What she said!" before falling back into the crowd of people.

The weeks that followed the opening were ones that Lorelai would never forget. The Dragonfly seemed to grow in popularity with each passing day. People from all over came to stay, finding charm and tranquility in the small town. The constant capacity caused for long hours which Lorelai and Sookie were more than happy to put in.

A new manager and chef had taken their place at the Independence, but they both would stop in on occasion to visit the old staff, at least the ones that had not followed them over to their new business. Lorelai found little difficulty in being able to go back to the old Inn. She figured that this was due in large part to the fact that her own career life had catapulted so far off of the ground.

Though she could still visit that part of her past without any sadness, walking past or even within the vicinity of what used to be _Luke's _diner, was nearly impossible. It was inevitable, she knew. Every business in town was on the same block, so trying to avoid it would have been like trying to avoid a vicious wind- unfeasible, unless you wanted to just remain indoors.

It had yet to be rented out, and Lorelai wondered why that was. It seemed to her like it would be a businessman's dream location. She didn't know that Luke had received many offers to rent out the restaurant, but unable to convince him of a longer lease, every interested party had gone elsewhere. She also didn't know that with each decline in lease agreement, Luke rested a little easier. He felt like with someone else's name on the diner's window, it would really substantiate the whole ordeal and would be the final nail.

The month was now October. Lorelai had been dating a guy who she had met at one of the Inn's meet and greets. They had been on three dates, and she, as she sat staring across the table at him on their fourth, wondered how she would break the news that she was not interested in anything beyond friendship. He sat talking, and she stared at his face, wondering what had really attracted her to him in the first place. He was attractive, but more in an _awww, yes you are_… kind of way. They had shared their first kiss on the doorsteps of her home two dates ago, and Lorelai had known every since then that she was really not in the mindset to be dating. She knew that it was getting to that time when the poor schmuck would be expecting to get invited inside, and she was not about to let that happen. So she continued to listen to him. And she continued to think…about how to drop him without hurting him. He _was _a nice guy after all. A thought flew across her mind reminding her to pick up some Mallo-Mars from Doose's. This elicited her first real smile of the night.

XXXXXXX

Luke looked around at the place he had called home for the past eight months. A tear made its way down his face, and his being alone didn't stop the urgency at wiping it away. He sat down, exhausted and in desperate need of a shower and some sleep. He had been at the hospital for the past 30 hours, and the rest of his family had just left the house.

He slid down onto the couch and caught sight of his great aunt's walker as it lay in the same spot that it had fallen. He closed his eyes and rubbed a tired hand over his face. He couldn't help but think of the last thing Aunt Mae had said to him. The way it had come out, it sounded so final, and Luke had focused more on that fact than the words that had actually come out of her mouth. He had held her hand down to the last second when the heart monitor sang out the song of eternal stillness.

Aunt Mae was buried on a Tuesday morning.

-OOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO-

Lorelai rushed in the house and struggled with getting her umbrella to close. Stars Hollow had had no rain for weeks, and it seemed as if the residents were now paying for all of those dry weeks tenfold. Rain fell heavily outside.

"I'm sorry, Babies," Lorelai said to her Blahniks. "Mommy is so sorry. I swear I will make it up to you." She dropped her things by the door. "You remember that Gualtier you two were eyeing? Well, it's yours." She started up the stairs. "I know it was love at first sight, and I will go back and buy it. I promise. Sale or no sale." She stripped off her clothes as soon as she was in her bedroom and headed for the shower. "Stupid weatherman. Bright and sunny with 30 percent chance of rain, my ass," she mumbled.

She finished her shower and put on some pajamas before heading down the stairs. She went straight into the kitchen and pulled out a box of pizza rolls. Before she had a chance to dump them in the pan, the doorbell sounded.

"Coming!" She yelled. Not wanting to wait any longer than she had to for her food, she quickly poured them sloppily in a pan and threw them in the oven. She ran to the door. "Three seconds," she yelled. "Two seconds! One more second," she finished grabbing for the door. She yanked it open.

"Hey Babette. Taking another one of your nature showers?" She looked the woman up and down as water dripped from her high yellow raincoat.

"Ha!" She sung out. "You're funny, Doll," she said genuinely.

"Come on in," she said waving her in.

"Naw, I don't wanna mess up your nice floor." Her voice rose in octaves. "I'm drippin' water everywhere!"

"Okay," Lorelai said leaning against the open door. "Then what can I do you for?" She asked smiling.

"Have you heard about Luke?"

Her smile faded. "No, what happened? Is he hurt?"

"No, he's back, Honey!"

Lorelai's brows wrinkled. "What?"

"He's here. In the diner."

"He-he's in his diner? In Stars Hollow? Now?"

"Yes, yes, and yeah. I figured ya probably didn't know, ya know, with your fancy new job takin up all your time and all."

"When'd he come back? Is he visiting? Thanksgiving is weeks away. Why's he here so soon?"

"Honey, calm down." She leaned on one leg and started to gesticulate. "Now, my sources told me he came back a couple hours ago. Apparently something happened because he took down the "for lease" sign in the window of the diner. He moved some of the tables too! They were five inches from the wall. Now, they're fifteen!"

"What, you think he's back for good?"

"I don't know, but all signs point to 'yes'. I mean you don't just come back to move tables, ya know?" She paused. "He didn't tell ya anything in those letters he sends ya?"

Lorelai's shocked expression dropped as she lowered her eyes to glare at Babbette. "How did you know about my letters?"

She waved her hands. "Enh, ya throw a couple bucks to a guy, he'll give ya a peak in anyplace."

"Good to know the US postal service is on its job," Lorelai replied. She got lost in her own head for a moment before responding. "No, I haven't gotten a letter in a while, so I, uh, didn't know." She started biting her nail. "And he's there now?"

"Sexy as eva's my guess."

"Okay. Okay," Lorealai backed away from the doorway slowly as she looked around for shoes. "I have to go. I have to go and see- -where the hell's my shoes when I need them?!" She twirled around quickly as she scanned the floor. "Oh, forget it," she said, moving past Babbette. "Turn off the stove for me, Babbette!" She yelled as she took off running down the steps.

"Suga, put something on your feet!" Babbette yelled to her rapidly disappearing frame. She shook her head and stepped inside of the house. "Well, betta go ahead and lock up for the night. Doubt she'll be back," she said loudly to herself.

Lorelai ran quickly through the rain, unable to feel a drop of it as it pounded her body. Her rapid pace caused an even greater assault on her skin, but it affected her none as she moved swiftly toward the diner. For the first time in almost a year, she was looking forward to seeing it.

-OOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO-

Lorelai stood outside of the diner looking up at the second floor window. A light shined through, and she could see a shadow of someone moving around. She closed her eyes and looked up toward the sky as if in silent prayer. She had started to shake from both the weather and from anticipation of what she'd find when she arrived at the diner.

She walked over and reached up to the top of the door as she felt around for Luke's old spare key. She didn't actually expect to find one, but was pleasantly surprised when her hand came in contact with a short piece of metal.

XXXXXX

Luke looked up questioningly when he heard a knock at the door. His first thought was how someone had gotten in the building in the first place, but he also wondered who could be out in such a heavy downpour. He walked over and opened the door without asking who it was.

"Lorelai," he whispered with surprise.

A relieved look passed over her face as she dropped her head and reached out to grab the doorframe for support. She lifted her head and said in a tear-filled voice, "Hey Luke."

He took in her appearance. "Oh my- - what are you doing out here like this? You don't even have shoes on! Are you trying to die of pneumonia?! You're almost blue!" Lorelai smiled widely as she got a big dosage of one of Luke's very missed rants.

"You're back," she said softly, stating the obvious.

"Yeah, I'm back," he said still looking like he wanted to yell at her some more about her thoughtlessness in attire and appropriate cover.

She sobered up. "Are you just here for now?"

He sighed and finally dropped the worried and angry look at the possibility of her getting sick. A slow smile made its way across his lips. "I'm _back_, Lorelai."

She brought a hand up to her face as she wiped away rain water. "How is that possible?"

He dropped his gaze to the floor and shuffled his sock-covered feet. "My Aunt Mae passed away a few weeks ago."

Lorelai's hopeful expression became sullen. "Aw Luke. I'm so-- Can I- - Do you need- -" She sighed. "I am _so _sorry," she ended.

"It's okay. I'm dealing with it," he said looking up.

Lorelai looked up at him sadly as she walked fully into the apartment. When she moved, her bare, wet feet squeaked on the floor board. This snapped Luke back to the situation at hand. "I can't believe you came out with no shoes on. Oh my god, look at you! You're shaking!"

Lorelai looked down to her body and dismissed her own state quickly. "Why didn't you call me when you got back?" She asked.

Luke had started walking over toward his dresser drawer. He spoke loudly as more distance separated them. "I knew you would be at work, so I didn't want to bother you. I figured I'd just call you tomorrow."

"Bother me?" She asked dubiously.

"Yeah," he answered distractedly as he rummaged around inside the drawers.

She stared at him for a moment. "You would _not_ have...bothered me."

He pulled out some clothing and walked back over to her, releasing a large sigh. "I'll keep that in mind next time," he said with a small wink. He reached the clothes out to her. "Now, take these, go in there," he pointed to the bathroom, "get in the shower, HEAT UP, _Crazy Lady_...get dressed and come back out and I'll make you some coffee."

"But Luke, it's been--"

"Lorelai," he interrupted, allowing his bass to drown out her words. "Bathroom. Now."

She couldn't help but break out in a wide grin as she shook her head. "Okay," she conceded as she moved toward the bathroom. "I'm going in the bathroom. _Now_."

--------------

Luke knocked on the bathroom door. "Lorelai, here's a towel and washing cloth. Sorry, I couldn't find a _louffa_," he replied smiling at her request for one.

Her voice shook a little as she spoke, but she spoke loud enough to be heard over the running shower. "Okay, you can come in."

Luke hesitated before asking, "You decent?"

"You can come in," she repeated with more confidence.

The bathroom door opened slowly and a towel peaked through. Luke's arm came in the room as he blindly tried to set the towel and rag on the sink's counter. His arm was about four inches shy, but he continued to wave the fluffy towel around in search of somewhere to set it. Lorelai held back laughter as she watched this take place. She said nothing.

He did this for ten seconds before sticking one leg in to allow him a greater stretching distance. He still missed the counter by inches, but he still blindly reached. Lorelai shook her head as she amusedly watched his actions.

He muttered an expletive before finally sticking his head in the door to put an end to the fumbling. As soon as his head was through the door, he caught sight of a naked Lorelai. "Oh, god! I'm sorry." He dropped the towel to the floor and tried to exit the bathroom quickly.

"Luke, wait," Lorelai said as she crossed the small bathroom space and placed a hand over his as it rested on the doorknob.

"I'm sorry," he offered again as his head remained turned away from all the...nakedness. "I thought you were in the shower." He felt his skin burning hot beneath her touch.

"I know," she said softly. She placed the other hand on his arm and pulled on it gently. Everything in him was wanting to turn and see the sight before him, but he resisted. That is, until he felt her pull on his arm. He turned his head and tried his best to remain looking in her face. "But," she continued, "I would rather have some company," she whispered.

Luke started to stumble horribly over his words. "Oh--you--you--want--okay--so--I'm--..."

As he continued to "talk", Lorelai smiled up at him and pulled him fully into the bathroom closing the door behind him. She stepped to him, eyes connected with his as she brought her fingers to his sides. He stopped rambling and got lost in her eyes for a second. She slid her hands up until they rested under his T-shirt. She stilled her hands before slowly inching her way around to his back and then back to the sides as she lifted her hands bringing his shirt higher and higher.

"Arms up," she whispered. He reached down and grabbed his shirt, pulling it over his head as if in a daze.

Lorelai allowed her hands to slide gently back down his sides. "Do you want this?" She asked him as her hands rested at the waistband of his sweatpants.

He stared into her eyes. "More than my next breath," he replied as he brought a hand up to her cheek.

"I'm with you there," she said as she closed her eyes at his touch.

He let his hand travel from her jaw to the nape of her neck, and she rolled her head slowly into his hand. "I missed you so much," he said softly.

She swallowed. "I need you," she said.

He brought his mouth to hers and whispered, "I breathe you," before bringing his lips to hers.

Lorelai moaned loudly as her hands found a new place on his lower back. Her lips parted and into her mouth slipped his tongue, soft and gentle. Luke's tongue glided over hers and he familiarized himself with a sweetness that one kiss eight months prior had left lingering in his soul.

Lorelai, with eyes closed, wished that she could press herself against him so tightly that it would allow her to slip inside and use him as an eternal blanket. Everything seemed to make sense, and life seemed to be one with so much more purpose as her mouth moved jointly with his.

She loosened her grip on his back and brought them back to his waistband as she pushed them down slowly. Luke moved from her mouth to her neck, detaching his mouth completely as she dipped down slightly to push his pants down further. She stood back up and drew in a breath as she took in the beautiful sight before her. He gave her a moment to look, taking the same moment to take in her beauty as well.

Growing impatient with the lack of contact, Luke returned his lips to her skin and lips as he stepped out of his pants. He gripped her back lightly as he moved backward toward the door, wanting to take their action onto his bed. Lorelai stopped him. She continued to kiss him with extreme passion as she gently gripped his elbows and started walking backward toward the tub. He followed her direction willingly and without question. At that point, she could have led him off of Mount Kilimanjaro, and he wouldn't have put up a fight.

She lifted her leg and stepped in as Luke bent down and removed both his socks. He followed her into the tub and under the very hot spraying water. As soon as the heated water hit their bodies, it seemed to add another level of urgency and desire to their touches and tasting.

Luke leaned into her, pressing himself against her sex. "Oh my god," she whispered as she clutched at his shoulders, vying for a firm hold on something. She bent her leg back and climbed up on the little ledge as she attached herself to his body, returning her mouth to his lips. The throbbing between her legs was almost making her dizzy.

He pressed her into the side wall and lost a little of his footing in doing so. They almost went tumbling but were both too far gone to find any humor in it.

He pushed her up on the wall and attempted to guide himself into her, but again, the traction was not there.

After another failed attempt, Lorelai pushed at his body, causing him to back up a little. She hopped down and circled his body leaning up and placing a soft kiss to the corner of his mouth. She turned her back to him and leaned against the back wall, presenting him with a view that he couldn't have conjured up in his most fulfilling dreams.

Like a moth to a flame, Luke went over and placed each of his hands on her hips as he admired her positioning. He ran his hands up and down her body slowly. He leaned down and a placed a gentle kiss on her back.

"Luke," Lorelai called out achingly.

He stood up and spread his legs as far as the bathtub's width would allow. Leaning back slightly, he slowly guided his length into her. Her tightness around his shaft caused him to release a strangled moan that grew as more and more of him was buried inside of her.

Lorelai reached a hand out and grabbed a hold on the shower curtain as she felt that any moment she would be pushed over the edge. She correlated a beautiful song of pleasure sounds that Luke used as his own inspiration and driving force.

He reached both of his hands out and brought them to her breasts, and she brought her body up closer to his as he continued to maneuver his hips in a way that nearly caused her forget her own name.

Her face was now positioned next to his as he continued to penetrate her. "Please tell me this is real," Lorelai said hoarsely as she lifted an arm and wrapped it back around his neck. She had imagined such a connection with him for the better part of a year, and as she stood receiving thrust after blissful thrust from Luke, her body, mind, and spirit needed to know that she would not wake up and discover that it was all a dream.

He kissed her neck as he struggled with coherence. "It's real." He pushed harder against her. "It's real," he repeated until his words were drowned out by the sounds of her climactic screams. Her internal muscles tightened fiercely around him causing him to follow close behind her with his own release.

They both rested against the side of the tub as they tried to resist the urge to just slide the wall. This being the moment in past months when Lorelai would usually awaken in a sea of sweat and sometimes disappointed tears, the only thing she could think to say as Luke held her tightly in his arms was, "It's real."

-OOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO-

Lorelai rolled off of Luke and relied on heavy breaths to allow air back into her lungs. "Oh my god, are we good at that!" She said as she kicked cover off of her damp body.

"You are amazing," Luke said as he leaned over and started to kiss all over her face. She wrapped her hands around him and pulled him on top of her as she opened her legs and wrapped them around his body. Her movements were playful, but turned serious and grew in intensity as her mouth searched out his and they resumed passion that had yet to burn out since Lorelai's arrival three hours prior.

The kiss slowed down and they just lay gazing at one another. "I can't stop touching you," Lorelai said as her hands roamed his back.

"You don't see me complaining," he replied, kissing her lightly. He attempted to lift himself off her.

"No, don't," she said holding him tighter.

"Lorelai," he began with a gentle tone, "I'm too heavy."

"You say that like that's going to convince me to let you go." He released a sigh and adjusted himself so that a little less pressure could rest on her. She continued to watch him. "Luke," she said. He looked her in the eyes. "Can you do me a favor?"

"Anything," he replied as he wondered what she was about to ask.

"It's a pretty big favor," she warned playfully.

"Anything," he repeated.

She dropped the smile that had sprung up to cover up her very serious request. Luke's intense and solemn gaze brought out the rawness of her emotions. "Can you please not leave again?"

He ran his hand through her hair. "I won't leave again, Lorelai."

"Ever?"

"Not if I have anything to say about it," he said still with his locked gaze.

Her lip quivered, but she brought it in quickly, a genuine smile broadening her face. She nodded her head. "Good," she said softly. She moved around a bit. "Now get comfortable," she told him.

"What?" He asked looking down at her like she was insane. "I know you don't expect me to sleep like this."

"Oh, do you know that?" She asked dubiously. "What else do you _think_ you know, Mr. Danes?"

"I know I'm not about to dive headfirst into that trap," he answered.

"Ahh, you learn quick grasshoppa," she said in an accent even she couldn't place.

"Once you've hit the same pothole 1500 times, you kind of learn to veer to the left a little."

"And then you get your eyes checked…and maybe your tires too because if you've hit- -"

"Goodnight, Lorelai."

She smiled and kissed the top of his head. "Goodnight Luke."

-OOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO-

"She did not say that!" Lorelai said as a wide smile decorated her face.

"She did to say that," he said with a smile of his own. He joined her at his kitchen table with a plate of toast, eggs, and turkey bacon in front of him.

Lorelai's eyes went wide. "Wow."

"All you can think to say is 'wow'?"

"What do you say when someone tells you that their ex left town because of you?"

"I don't know. Something."

Okay, then…I'm flattered, I guess."

"No, you're not."

"Well, it is a little weird, Luke."

"I shouldn't have even told you," he said.

"No," she said quickly. "I'm glad you told me." She took a sip of her coffee while looking at him over the rim. "What made you tell me that?" She asked.

"I don't know." He was silent for a minute. "Last night before I fell asleep, I kind of thought about what my aunt said to me before she…" Lorelai nodded her understanding. He continued. "And then it just kind of clicked." He did a 'whatever' gesture with his eyes. "When I was making breakfast, I had like a déjà vu thing."

"A déjà vu thing?" Lorelai repeated rolling her neck.

"Must you mock everything I say?"

"Uh, yeah," she said with feigned insistence. She got serious and leaned on the table. "What did your aunt say to you?"

He paused as if in thought.

"You don't have to tell me if you don't want to," she said quickly.

"No, it's fine. I was just…thinking." He looked up at her. "She told me not to wait."

"Really?"

"Yeah, she said that life is too short. 'Don't spend your time twiddling your thumbs when you can be using those same thumbs to get the ball rolling'." He smiled. "Verbatim."

Lorelai smiled. "And what was she referring to?" She asked with a soft gaze.

"Bowling?" He answered, breaking out in a wide smile.

"Luke," she whispered turning her head at an angle.

Hearing Lorelai try to keep any conversation serious almost made Luke fall off of his chair. He slowly dropped his smile, feeling a little exposed. "She meant that I needed to tell you how I felt and stop hinting at it in letters."

Lorelai leaned back in her chair and released a sigh like she'd just gotten the payoff after a long wait. She looked down to her lap. Luke continued to watch her for a reaction.

"Say something. I'm feeling a little naked here." She looked up and smiled, making all the naughty responses to his comment come off loud and clear. "Don't even say it," he said tiredly.

Lorelai bit her lip. She stood up and walked around to where he sat. She lifted her leg over his lap and placed it on the opposite side of where she stood as she got in a nice, comfortable straddling position. Luke instantly linked his fingers on her back. "How did we ever get through all those years without this?" She asked as she played with the curls at the back of his head.

He shrugged. "Maybe if you would have seduced me years ago, we wouldn't have had to."

Her mouth dropped open. "I did _not_ seduce you!"

"Oh, you totally seduced me," he said with a grin.

"Whatever," she said turning a slight shade of pink.

"If you wouldn't have, then I would've," he said as he tried to catch her eyes, which had fallen.

She looked back up at him. "And how exactly would you have…" She swiveled her hips. "…done that?"

He stood up quickly, grabbing her back for support as he playfully dipped her toward the floor. She screamed and started to laugh. "Master of seduction," she breathed out.

"I try," he said as he placed her on her feet.

-OOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO-

"Oh my god, it's a beautiful day!"

Sookie stared at her like she was crazy. "It's raining cats and dogs outside. What day are you referring to?"

"Oh, Sookie. Sookster. Sook_alicious_," she said thoughtfully as if testing each one.

"Are you high?" Sookie asked seriously as she leaned toward her.

"What?! Sookie, no!" Lorelai said with a wide grin.

She laughed at Lorelai's reaction. "Well, it's either that or you had some really good se—" Her mouth dropped open. "Oh my god! Oh my god! Oh my god!" She grew louder as Lorelai's reaction failed to deny what she was about to say.

"Will you lower your voice?" Lorelai said looking around.

"Sorry," Sookie said giggling. "So…?"

"Luke came back."

"Oh, that is so fantastic," Sookie said with seriousness. She knew how much his absence had affected Lorelai. "That is awe--. Wait, you guys had sex?"

She gave Sookie a shy smile. "I have never felt like this, Sookie," she said softly. "I feel like, I don't know, like I'm floating." She looked around the Inn. "I don't even want to be here right now. I just want to like spend every tiny second with him. I'm pathetic."

"Sweetie, it sounds like you're in love."

She released a sigh as she looked at Sookie. "I kinda figured as much," she said casually.

"So, I take it you haven't told him how you're feeling."

"Not in so many words."

Sookie reached out and nudged her shoulder. "Well, he's back now. So, you have plenty of time to do it," she encouraged.

Lorelai looked down at Sookie for a long moment before a look of determination fell over her face. "Sookie, I'm going to go out for a while. Call my cell if you need me." She headed toward the door.

"Wait, where are you going?" Sookie called after her.

Lorelai turned back to face her with a smile. "I'm going bowling, Sook." Sookie's face scrunched up in confusion. "I'll explain later," Lorelai said laughing as she rushed out the door.

**---The End---**

Okay, I hope that was good 'cause if I say I went off the cuff, that would be a major understatement. 1.)sex in shower, 2.)kirk staring through window 3.)running through rain 4.)tearful goodbye -were the ONLY things I had planned out. Everything else was just kind of shoved in. I'm a little nervous about this one. Please let me know your thoughts. Thank you.


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